Ti

http://www.thinkgeek.com/gadgets

If there was ever a use for titanium, this was it, screw supersonic aircraft and hollow weight bike frames. The Spork is the weapon of kings in my opinion, i am of two minds as to whether it needs a bottle opener on the end, useful, but perhaps a bastardisation of a pure work of art?
mine would have a thicker handle myself, none of this airy fairy rubbish, a slab of materials to wield said weapon by, its super light anyway, might as well take advantage.